When I see a new plastic surgery consult, it is very common that they bring up their concern about vanity. If they are describing what bothers them they may say…’I don’t want you to think I’m vain’…or…’I don’t want to seem vain’. Or they may even ask near the end of our discussion…’You don’t think I am too vain do you?’ Having heard this vanity concern so often, it prompted me to investigate what vanity really is and are they really being vain.
Why do we look in the mirror every time we pass one? It is hard for most of us not to. We are all more obsessed with our appearance than we would like to admit. But that does not make us vain. According to Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary, vanity means excessive pride in one’s appearance or self-worth, in other words, conceit. Having concern about one’s appearance, however, is quite normal and understandable and should not be construed as being vain. It is not conceit to want to look one’s best.
While concern about appearance has been present since antiquity and in every culture, today there is a greater degree of concern about it. Advances in technology, particularly that of the media and the internet, has caused normal concerns about how we look to become obsessions for some. In the work place, there is great concern to look one’s best and not look tired to help one make the next sale or get the next promotion. Because of mass marketing and advertising, we see attractive people all the time leading us to believe that good looks are the norm and should be sought after. This is certainly true when it comes to weight where only a fraction of the population is as thin as the media would have us to believe based on the images that they put forth. All of this can create insecurities for some, particularly the young and to those who must compete with the young.
Nearly 90% of all plastic surgery procedures, surgical and non-surgical, are done by women. Women are much more critical of their appearance than men and have more distortions in their image perceptions. This is because women are judged more by their appearance than men are. Men tend to be judged more by what they do and have. This results in men generally have a more positive self-images (they would say they care less about what they look like) often to the point of overestimating their appearance. This is particularly true in men of wealth and position. Many men will suffer some body dissatisfaction between the ages of 45 to 55 during the male menopause or so called midlife crisis period or if they have to re-enter the social dating world due to divorce or loss of a spouse.
My conclusion is that the vast majority of patients seeking plastic surgery are not vain and nor should they be concerned about being so. Their objectives are not to get ahead of their neighbors or fellow employees nor are they likely to walk around after feeling that they are superior to everyone else. Vanity or conceit is a destructive life force. Rather, they simply want to look their best and be as good as they can be…even if the reason is not to be left out or endure unspoken prejudice because of the way they look. The desire to fit in and be viewed as healthy and vibrant…to improve one’s self-image…is a constructive and positive life force. After all, cosmetic plastic surgery is really about self-image improvement…and that is not vain at all.
Dr. Barry Eppley
Indianapolis, Indiana